Motherhood on Tour: Wardrobe Malfunctions

Recently I crawled out from the Havin’ Lots O’ Babies cave where I’d been not-sleeping the past 8 years and heard some amazing news!

*** JANET JACKSON JUST RELEASED A NEW ALBUM! ***

Here is what you should probably know:

  • I am unsure whether this album is actually still “new.”
  • I am unsure whether the word “album” is actually still relevant.
  • I am unsure whether this is the proper way to use bullet points.

Unfortunately, as the above will illustrate, I am no longer cutting-edge enough to make an intelligent comment on this breaking news, nor do I definitively know what those polka dots are supposed to be doing next to those words up there.

Here is what I know about Janet Jackson:  Continue reading

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Over-Sext

Confession: I’m not much of a sexter. While I fancy myself a first-rate Casanova (or whoever the female Casanova is.. Colette, perhaps?) who brings it in the boudoir,* sexting has always kind of weirded me out. Fortunately for you, me and—let’s face it—humankind, I decided to push through the discomfort and learn to sext with the lyrical prowess of Sydney Leathers.

Royal FPAnd how better to master the art of sexting than to dive straight into the deep end: sexting a friend’s husband using her phone. There’s nothing like a little anonymity to move things along! Continue reading