Puka is a freelance advertising creative who’s so busy she didn’t even have time to write this bio. Instead she happily delegated it to her extremely attractive, supernaturally talented personal assistants who are contributors on this blog. When she’s not helping the Catholics sell God, executives sell unholy cow feed, and rich, old people part with their money, she treats her kitchen like an FDA unapproved science lab, growing all kinds of weirdness on her kitchen counter, like yogurt cultures, vegetable culture and wild yeast. She’s amazed by the fact that members of her family are still alive. She tries to cook up ridiculously healthy concoctions made with alterna flours and animals who lived very happy lives, generally fooling herself into believing that she feels better than 83.87739% of the population. She lives with her husband, two young children and her mother (!) who often behaves like a young child.
Dru grew up in a college town in a flyover state, which she left shortly after her 21st birthday, convinced that wild horses could never drag her back. After spending a decade in Southeast Asia, South Africa and ultimately Washington, DC, she realized she longed for three things: a backyard, a dog, and a boyfriend. None of those appeared to be on the horizon in our nation’s capitol, so it was back to the Great Plains for Dru. She pays the bills with editorial and marketing consulting, has two sons and a giant rescue mutt, and is married to an IT guy, which means she frequently finds herself buried to the waist in a nest of remotes and fancy devices, unable to simply turn on the TV. She remains confused about how she ended up living so goddamn far from a beach and misses Thai street food with a hunger as deep as the South China Sea.
Vi is a garden variety professional who enjoys shouting from the rooftops that she once worked as a genuine paid writer. In the olden days when she got paid for her writing instead of doing it here for a big fat nothing, Vi tinkered around with nonprofit newsletters, farted around with magazine features and sold out for campaigns she didn’t care a poop about, before passionately devoting herself to a pop culture blog where she wrote about mullets and Twinkies. She is married to a man and has enough pets and young children to keep her comfortably covered in stickers, dander and feces until the end of time. In her spare time, she does anything that doesn’t produce more stickers, dander or feces. Her unintentional hobbies are collecting stickers, dander and feces.